Introduction

Hi, my name is Holley and meet my sweet seizure doggie, AnnaBelle! This is my first blog, It has taken me a while to figure out how to set this blogger thing up so I have some entries ready to be put in here, that I've already written.
I will either write about living with epilepsy, share some poetry, or just talk about what's going on in my shaky lil life:)
Holley

May 2, 2014

Sooo

I have really slacked here..

It happens. I highly doubt I can say everything that has happened since my last entry. Because so much has happened.. My brother is not doing much better but he is my hero.

Hugh is my hero because I've never seen someone with a passion, a love for life, most if all a love so big ... It's bigger than anything you could ever imagine- the love for his children and his wife because if they were not a part if his life, he would have threw in the cards a long time ago. But for 8 years we've seen miracles from a boy who we never thought we would ever seen one from. His will, determination, fight, and hard headed attitude has kept him going! That and he's so active! The second time he was diagnosed he called to tell me and was building a deck while still changing tires in big rigs- mind you he had tumors all in his GI tract! Now with it being spread and matastisized he recently built a garage. However, due to intense pain he has been slowed down

When he was told there were no more options, he found options by going to Cancer Treatment Centers of America, then came back down here and started a new treatment plan with the doc down here along with going on a special diet eating foods that kill cancer cells. He is so amazing! And guess what? He's my big brother! I'm so blessed!

My shakes are not quite as bad as they were when they first came back. I am not where I want to be health wise and I know I can be so much healthier if I could just light a damn match under my doctors buttocks!

My VNS battery needs to be replaced, meds need changing bc I'm losing my hair! And he increased the drug he put me on for migraines (it is also an anti epilepsy drug) but it hasn't helped my migraines. In fact they are worse, and when I told him about my hair he said take vitamins, it was the drug. What he failed to mention is that the other medication I am on that is for epilepsy has same side effect: hair loss!!!

So now I have a spot where my hair is extremely thin!

I mean crazy! In high school my hair was so thick, I shaved underneath to thin it out! (That and all my friends did it and Clo was itchin to shave it! Haha) my mom still doesn't know about that- guess she will when or if she reads this. I highly doubt it. Haha!

So imagine having hair so thick and hating it to looking in the mirror with tears in your eyes wishing you never said you hated it, and what you'd give to have it back! Fro-ness, frizz and all!

I'm ready for CBD oil.. The natural way... I'm sick of putting all these toxins in my body! I would love to see all natural medical treatments.. I know it isn't all possible but for the most part it is... They just won't tell you because of pharmacutical companies and the govt- a severely f'ed up system! F'ing with the lives if people! 

P

AnnaBelle my little service dog is about to have her 2nd birthday!🐶

I just don't know what I'd do without my little lifesaver! She brings me so much joy! Tonight she climbed in lap and sat up to put her head on my shoulder, I gave her a hug and she just kinda scooted around to get comfy. This made me laugh bc it was too cute, but then she just fell asleep right there nestled on my chest.... And then I melted! She melts my heart, I never had a dog of my own but for my first dog... Man I really won the jackpot! So happy birthday my sweet AnnaBelle, my little lifesaver.. In too many ways to count! I love you so much and I vow to be the best human momma ever!

I am getting sleepy, even though I have much more to update you on. Such as:

-purple day2014

- proclamation!!

- nominated for Purple Day Ambassador

-elected Purple Day Ambassador for Mobile,Al

-book update

-art contest for epilepsy foundation

- and so much more!

Going to see my Daddy tomorrow so will tell you all about that too!

G'night and God Bless

Holley

Never

       

I never knew I'd ever feel a love that was true...

To me.

I never expected my best friends to go away...

Never.

I never knew an aching heart could go on for so long..

Never.

I was taught to love with everything that you've got..

I do.

I never thought I'd go blind by love..

I did.

And I sure didn't think I'd be left behind...

Wondering why

Why, give and give all my love 

When love keeps walking away

Why can't I see the hurt before I give my heart away

I never thought the love I gave, the friendship I had would ever be accompanied with shame..

It was.

In all of the pain life has thrown my way, none could be any greater than that.

After all the hurt I've endured somehow I still care..

about you. (Why?)

Because you will continue to disregard 

Life isn't a game, and I will not be played.

H.Reese©2014